I've been a tad greedy with work projects and said YES to absolutely everything and then I whinge about being up all hours working and having no life and no time. My reasoning, at the time, is to get ahead now so that I can afford to take some time off over summer to get that bikini bod down to the beach with the peeps. The bikini bod is not at all achievable, but I do intend to hit the beach.
I'm feeling left out of things at the moment and looking forward to nailing these last projects. Barnstormer told me the other day that I was not allowed to go with them to the pool because I "haven't finished my work or met my deadlines". She just turned 4. She talks like a performance manager. She told me I "need to re-organise my work things so that I have time to do fun stuff". She also said that "making excuses is not the way to go". Why am I not as intelligent as her? It's not fair.
Even though this year has another couple of months to it, I have learnt that:
- I am crap at meeting deadlines when it comes to writing my books.
- I am most excellent and efficient at meeting deadlines when it comes to editing reports.
- I spend too much time looking at life through a screen of some sort.
- My medication makes me focus on myself, to the detriment of other family members, more than I should.
- I lost my mind some years ago, but more recently, my medication has severely diminished my short-term memory.
- I think my short-term memory has disappeared.
- Did I mention that I don't seem to remember anything?
1. Get off the meds. Or at least CHANGE the medication.
It's affecting my ability to work. I can't remember how I've styled things in documents and am continually backtracking. I feel like Guy Pearce in Memento. I have to keep writing notes to myself about things to remember. I've missed appointments, I've missed Barnstormer's ballet lessons, I've cooked meals three times. I've left taps running and left the house. I've forgotten where I've parked the car at shops. I've forgotten where I'm going when I've got in the car. I've forgotten if I've taken my medication that morning. I've forgotten that HM's aunty died four days ago and asked how she was.
2. Just say NO to book contracts.
Unless there is nothing else going, the motivation just isn't there at the moment to meet deadlines.
3. Walk along the beach every morning.
This stuff is GOLD. Makes me feel good all day.
Right, I feel better already just for writing all of that down. How is everyone else travelling at this time of the year?